I have something to say....

This post has been moved to: http://whatbechastosay.blogspot.com.au/

Sad

A different kind of post today because if I don't I might spontaneously combust. I'm feeling quite low right now, it's hard to be the one that's up all the time you know? The holidays were long, hard and exhausting and I'm at the end of my rope. I'm tired of kids fighting, I'm tired of the girls hurting one another, I'm sick of hearing "muuuuuum", I'm sick of dealing with kids fighting/wanting me to open food/pour drinks/tell them they look good in their clothes whilst I'm in the shower/toilet, I'm tired of picking up everyone's shit, I'm tired of housework, I'm tired of days blurring into one another, I'm tired of not knowing where my life is going, I'm tired of feeling inadequate, I'm tired of worrying that my husband might leave me because of my inadequacy, I'm tired of worrying about losing friends because I'm not good enough to be their friend, I'm tired of feeling like I shouldn't like things because someone has a problem with those things, I'm tired of thinking things won't change, I'm tired of my brain telling me these stupid things to be tired of, I'm tired of feeling stagnate I'm just TIRED.

And I worry about writing this post and posting it because I don't want to bring others down and make them sad, but sometimes I have to let it out. And I hope by writing this post and getting it out that it will help me feel better.

And I'm not writing this for sympathy, or for you to judge me, or so you'll tell me how great I am or whatever nasty people will conjure up in their stupid heads, I'm writing this because I NEED to and this is MY blog.

I'm also sick of nasty people and their crap, and I will never understand their need to be nasty.

 And in closing:

I like One Direction and would like to be BFFs with them because they look like they have lots of fun.

I like the song Blurred Lines

Ryan Gosling isn't good looking

Anchovies are gross

Cheese Twisties are the best

I don't like Subway

You don't have to comment and my feeling will pass xx

Why hello there :-)

Hello there dear readers, if you're still there :-D I've been plodding along, still, yes I know, I plod a lot, but that's better than giving up all together right? RIGHT?? So I'm still going, I am in a healthy eating phase right now, and am losing winter weight (I assume, I haven't weighed in) thanks to lots of yummy salads and trying to drink lots of water, but still having regular things in moderation, I will never give up that because I think that's the way to go.

Exercise has been on an off, mostly off lately due to having cracked ribs, which I can tell you hurts A LOT, never been in so much pain before, not even when they cut me open to take the twins out. But I am on the mend now and will be getting back into that again shortly, slowly at first of course.

Am so looking forward to the warmer weather, it means more salads and lots of fresh yummy summer fruits, HELLO MANGO!!

So as you can see I am still here, I haven't disappeared off the face of the earth and I am still plodding along.

Noticed some old photos the other day and how much my face has changed since I first started, this and looking at the starting picture and all the support I have is what keeps me going, so here's a few pictures to show you:

Oh man, those cheeks, I'll always have the cheeks, have had them ever since I was born, but there's definite change of course. I'll keep on keeping on, it's not in my nature to give up :-D

Until next time xx

Selfies

Hello lovely readers, long time between posts I know, I really am terrible at this aren't I? Yes, I know, shut up. Anyway I am here now and I am here to talk about selfies. A lovely friend of mine Mrs Woog, wrote a blog post because she had posted a picture of herself which apparently cause someone to send her an email calling her "narcissistic" and saying "love yourself much", in which her response should've been "why yes I do because I rock" but anyway this lead me to think about selfies. Now I am a selfie whore, I love a good selfie and if you follow me on twitter or are my friend on Facebook you would be well aware of this. Someone asked me once why I took lots of photos of myself and my response was simple "I spent all up 20 years hating myself and avoiding having photos taken, now I'm happy with how I look I'm making up for lost time". I think this is fair, I mean I felt so terrible about myself there aren't many photos of myself with my children when they were babies and this is really sad when you think about it.

I will never understand people bringing others down, especially when they don't deserve it. All Mrs Woog did was post a picture of herself, it was offensive, it wasn't mean, it was a SELF picture, yet this person felt the need to bring her down. Well I say, post your selfies and be proud. If you love the way you look and you want others to see you then why not? The internet is a big place for everyone, if you're happy to share your photos then share your photos. Once upon a time I would never, ever have let anyone see my picture, I would never have taken my own picture, but now I'm a very proud photo taker and poser.

So, I emplore you, post your selfies and post them proudly. I want to see your selfies, whether it's because you think you look hot, you want to be silly, you want to practice your duck face, you want to embrace all the tired parents out there and show them you are not alone, post them, post them all, post them on twitter with the #selfiewhore and if you wish tag me in the post @becpobjie I want to see you in your selfie glory, you don't have to follow me, just show me your selfie, if you do follow me, pardon the swears ;)

Be proud of your selfies, here are some of mine:

COME FORTH AND UNITE SELFIE WHORES

Such a bad blogger

*Slinks back in*, well hello, hello??? Is anyone still out there reading? I know, I know, I am a terrible blogger. If you're still interested to read I am still plodding along, I've been naughty and not weighed in the last couple or weeks, again, I know, I know. But I HAVE been exercising, but this has been on and off, yes ok, shut up I KNOW! But you know bad stuff happens and it makes you feel like crap and you don't feel like doing anything like that.

But I always set out with the best intentions and I keep trying and that's the main thing right? RIGHT???? So anyway, when I kicked off my exercising again I had an epiphany on the treadmill, which may not be the right place to have a epiphany because you kind of have to be on the ball when you're on the treadmill, but I'm a rebel and I had one anyway. So my epiphany was: I am in charge of me, no one is running my show and I should do what I feel like. No one is making me exercise, I am my own (terrible) personal trainer. I don't have to set anything in stone, I don't have to have a set regime, I need to do what suits me on the day with the free time that I have. GENIUS! This made me feel so much better about exercising.

So now that I have figured that out, now I have to figure out how to get myself to drink all the water I should be drinking every day. Why is drinking water so hard?? It shouldn't be right? I'm terrible at keeping hydrated and I need to get better with that, maybe I should go to the pool in the hopes I'll have en epiphany about it if I'm submerged in water?, seeing as I had my exercise epiphany on the treadmill.

Have been thinking I should maybe set a goal weight goal again? I'm not sure. Maybe by my birthday next year? This is ample time really? Might help me pull my finger out? I wish someone would offer me a million dollars or something to sweeten the deal a little bit, anyone got a million dollars?

Anyway, I haven't given up hope, I'm still plodding along :D and I always have my before picture to keep me motivated ;)

Comparison Shots

Here are some comparison shots for you, 124kgs and now...

Oh man....

It has been so long, oopsies. I have still been plodding along, Christmas was great and we went away to Sydney to spend it with family. My plan for our holiday was to be good and to make sure I went for walks, but as per usual when you go on holiday all of that went right out of the window and it became "meh I'm on holiday". Am I the only one that does this? Gosh I hope not, and why is it that we do this? The good thing about my in-law's house has stairs and I had to go up and down them a lot to deal with the children, so it's not like I didn't get any. Anyway, we are back home now and I'm slowly getting back into a routine with my eating etc, once I hit my stride it will be fab. However I'm still scared to weigh in so I might wait until next Friday so I've had a few more days of eating properly.

I have decided also to get back into running now that my back isn't so sore, I've got the ease into 5k app for my iphone and Monday I will be hitting the treadmill. My girls are starting kinder and then I will be getting into more exercise as I will no longer be asked 200 questions whilst I'm trying to concerntrate on what I am doing, if anyone else has small kids and have tried to exercise with them around, you'll know it's almost impossible, and there's no way in hell I'm getting up at 5am or some other stupid time to exercise before they get up, I like my bed too much for that.

As I said in my last post I was going to go shopping the next day, and shop I did, I got heaps of things and here are some photos of some of the things I got.

I still have more things that I haven't yet taken pictures of but I will get around to it. It's a new year and it's time for new things. This year I will get to my goal, and my family and I have set goals too, we are going to have more fun and take more time out together, we are going to go away more and bascially enjoy life, last year there were some struggles and we hope with these goals in place maybe we can make things easier on ourselves. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and I hope you all have the most awesome 2013 xxxxx